Image Image Image Image Image Image Image Image Image Image

The Blue & Gray Press | August 25, 2019

Scroll to top


Sexclamations: In Ignoring Female Viewers, Pornography Industry is Mistaken


“Oh! Oh! Ohh!” Take that sound bite and repeat it for at least thirty minutes. Throw in a female or two with extremely long French nails or some other variety of unrealistic, fake nails. Don’t forget to make the first scene a blowjob and the last one a “moneyshot” to the face. The result is usually a stereotypical pornographic movie.

From real life experience, I can tell you that sex will not make you moan and cry “Oh!”  for the entire duration of the act, especially if it lasts for longer than a half hour. Don’t get me wrong—sex feels amazing. But chances are, waking up the neighbors with your cries of bliss will not be a top priority during sex. You can enjoy sex without sounding like a porn star trying to appeal to the camera and all of the horny men that will be watching the video.

Yes, horny men tend to be the primary viewers of porn.  Most porn is directed and made especially for men. Therefore, most porn contains an unrealistic amount of male domination, as illustrated by scenes of women being forced to “deep throat” and appear delighted and joyous when a male ejaculates on their faces. This is unfortunate, because women and curious adolescents tend to also watch porn, albeit irregularly. It is a shame there are not many explicitly sexual media outlets for women.

Similarly, it’s unfortunate that better sex education for adolescents is not easily accessible. Pre-teens should not need to turn to porn websites for information on sex. While it is true that males are more turned on by visual aids than women, I think I speak on the behalf of most women in saying that we appreciate some sort of visual aid, too.

For some women, a magazine cutout of a celebrity with their clothes on is appealing enough. For others, television shows or movies that borderline soft-core porn are enthralling. For those of you who don’t find those media outlets as exciting but also don’t yearn for the stereotypical porn presented at the beginning of this article, I recommend searching for amateur porn. It usually contains more foreplay, passionate kissing and caressing.

Considering that young, genuinely passionate couples create the majority of amateur porn videos, they are more relatable to an experience you have had or are more likely to achieve. Moreover, amateur porn is usually less stereotypical and degrading to both genders. In most amateur porn, neither the male nor the female is perceived as being overly dominant.

Please note that I am not endorsing porn, nor am I condemning it. Always do what you are comfortable with and what is aligned with your beliefs and moral values. If the stereotypical porn described in the beginning of this article floats your boat, then go for it. Just remember- your next real life sexual experience may not mirror the superficial nature of most pornography.

And don’t forget—Feb. 14 through 21 is National Condom Week! Prevent the spread of STDs and avoid unintended pregnancies by always wearing a condom.


  1. Humberto

    I’ve got one word for you: dominatrix. Porn is not geared towards men, it is made for whoever will buy it. What about bestiality? That’s got dogs dominating. Does that mean dogs are the target demographic of this?

    From what I read, you claim to have a lot of sex but don’t give much credit to men. men are horny dogs from what you say but what about women who are passionate? This is a step backwards for women and the rising popularity of gyno videos. I have a suggestion. Watch Edward Penis Hands, I really enjoyed it.

    I really appreciate your endorsement of condoms.

  2. Tiffany

    What was the point of this article? To alert everyone that porn exists and it’s sexist 99% of the time? Also, I understand why you’re encouraging readers to explore other options when it comes to visual stimulation, but amateur porn? Really? People frequently watch porn for the same reasons they watch other movies–because it’s a fantasy world that most of the population will never experience. Why would anyone want to watch amateur porn made by a “young, passionate couple” that looks exactly like what they could be doing themselves?

  3. May

    Thank you for illustrating this unfortunate, overwhelming trend. I often find myself irritated by the roles of women in porn. It’s true that inexperienced individuals turn to porn, hoping it will provide a further understanding about sex and then either being disappointed by this subjugation of females or, even worse and probably more likely, assuming that this is an appropriate way for women to be treated or to act during sex. Thanks again for writing all of these articles!

  4. christopher

    Hmmm… Yet another anti-sex diatribe that too often follows the same tired pattern.

    1. Define porn as something it is not.
    2. Paint “male desire” as misogynistic in nature. (Men love blow jobs. Get over it!)
    3. Scream “What about the children?”
    4. Reassure your readers that YOU are indeed open minded about porn, lest they remember that most of the article was spent criticizing it.
    5. Support condom usage to appear “pro-sex”

  5. Natalie

    I came to your column via your interview on The Sexist. I’m really impressed by your courage and your frank attitude! I hope you don’t get censored; it’s great to see this kind of content in this kind of context.

    Given your remarks in this article, perhaps you’d be interested in Filament magazine ( It’s a magazine aimed at heterosexual women and contains no dieting or fashion advice, and no celebrity nonsense. Instead, its pages are populated by intelligent articles about sexuality, cultural issues, and current affairs; original and daring erotic fiction; and, best of all, photographs of gorgeous men taken with the female gaze in mind. It’s a myth that women don’t respond to visual stimuli—they just don’t necessarily enjoy the same images that men do.