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The Blue & Gray Press | November 23, 2017

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Boy Meets Girl: Dos and Donts for Meeting "The One"

By BRYANT MATERA and KAT DICKINSON

Meeting people. Even with all the opportunities going to school here offers, meeting somebody can be a pretty tall order. Where are you supposed to meet that special someone?

We’re going to get one thing out of the way: whomever you brought home from whatever club last weekend isn’t likely to be “the one.” Let’s face it, do you really want your “how we met story” to sound like something from “Texts From Last Night”? Here’s how to do it in a way that won’t get you a sideways glance from everyone you know.

BAM: This is going to sound pretty obvious, but keep your eyes peeled in all the places YOU like to hang out. If you’re an athlete, for instance, or a comic book geek, that cute girl or that nice guy over there in the other aisle at your favorite store obviously has a shared interest. Plus, you’ve got a good conversation starter just begging for you to use.

KED: Sometimes you have caught the eye of an admirer and just don’t know it. This is especially for those of us who perform as an artist or as an athlete, as people have seen what you can do, and more than likely want to get to know you. Talk to the people who compliment your skills—maybe you could offer to show them a thing or two.

BAM: Every now and then, you really can get that lucky. However, I wouldn’t hold out for that kind of situation and just hope it falls into your lap. Get out there!

KED: The hardest thing about looking for that someone is keeping your options completely open. And when I say completely, I mean completely. You never know who might be ‘the one’ for you, and you definitely won’t ever find out if you’re too picky.

Just because someone made a bad or even terrible first impression doesn’t mean you should count them out. They just might have had an off moment or are just too nervous. Always, always, always give them that second chance. It just might pay off.

BAM: Cardinal rule number one: don’t close yourself off. But don’t be too free, either. I, for one, totally advocate being picky. You don’t eat or wear just anything, do you? It should be the same way for your significant other.

Yes, inevitably there will be caveats, but don’t sell yourself so short that you don’t get what you want. My old creed? Never settle for anything less than you feel you need and deserve.

KED: As Bryant said earlier, definitely keep your eyes open. Shared interests always get the ball rolling, and even though that might be all you have in common, sometimes that’s more than enough. Don’t ever change to fit into someone else’s life, though. That’s just fooling yourself and them, and it’s not fair to either one of you.

BAM: Altering yourself is a big no-no, unless what you’re cutting are parts that aren’t part of your core and are things you can honestly live without. Dishonesty before the relationship even gets started is planting a ticking time bomb.

Be vigilant around campus and in class. You can get pretty good at sizing people up just by observing them, and you might scope out someone you like with something in common. But don’t get too wrapped up that you forget to take notes or fall all over yourself. Then again, maybe they’ll have read this article and will forgive you spilling your Pepsi all over them.

There are plenty of other ways to meet people. The real secret, though, is to get out there and be you. Simple as that. Spring is in the air, and along with the flowers, it seems relationships also love to bloom. So if you’re on the market, go ahead and take a look.