By KATHERINE LAMB
There’s a person in one of my lectures who constantly has something to say that isn’t necessarily directly related to the topics we discuss in class. They also have a somewhat aggressive tone when speaking and often interrupt the professor. The professor, I know, tries to limit distractions but I feel they aren’t limiting appropriately or well enough. Others in the class feel the same way as I do. How should I approach the situation?
Bitter in Biology
It’s possible that things could get better if you met with the professor and politely indicated that off-topic discussions were impairing the progress of the class. Ask them if they might remind the class to only ask relevant questions. If that doesn’t work, let’s talk coping mechanisms. Audibly comment to another frustrated student how much you love that you can ask Google anything at all and you’ll find an answer without bothering other people. Try to remind yourself that these are still human beings that you’re dealing with. Above all, remember that at the end of the day, you get to rest and feel content that you have better interpersonal intelligence than at least one of your classmates.
There’s a guy I’ve been seeing for about two weeks now. He’s fun and intelligent and not unattractive. He might be the most gentle person I’ve ever met but the catch is, he deals LSD. The way I reacted when he told me this was to just not react because I have no idea how to react. Should this be a deal breaker? He said he does it because it’s easy money and a way to give his friends a good time. He also pulled out the Latin phrase “caveat emptor” [let the buyer beware] which implies a concerning amount of detachment. Don’t worry about me taking anything; I know my body doesn’t handle stimulants well. Other than this one questionable instance of moral relativity, I’ve never clicked so well with a person so fast. What should I do?
Look, the Ancient Romans are all dead, their land belongs to other nations and their language is only spoken by the pretentious. Their economic philosophies didn’t protect them and they won’t protect your new boytoy. Of course he’s detached from his transactions–he doesn’t want to flesh out the morality of what he’s doing. He knows better and so do you. You will not be able to convince him to change his behavior and you should find this behavior concerning. Nothing about him will change until he decides he wants to change it. For the sake of both of you, I hope that decision comes sooner than later. I don’t think you need to kick him out of your life completely but you will be better off if there’s at least a little more distance. Try to diversify your friend group a little as well, it’ll give you more cushion when your relationship inevitably fails. Even if he’s one in a million, there are seven thousand people just like him.